Thursday, September 8, 2011

Remotivation required

I'm not doing badly but I'm not doing super great either. I can't say that I'm motivated but I can't say that I am off course. I seem to be fighting ambivalence, if that is the right word. It's becoming too easy to put things off or to ignore them. I must relight the fire before it goes out completely.

There are things making it harder but I know they are just easy excuses. I don't have money to go buy the food I want. I'm having to live off my supplies for awhile, which is becoming incredibly boring. I also need to get into a routine of walking every day. But *insert whiny voice* I don't wanna. I feel like a petulant child who doesn't want to do her chores. But this is really starting to feel like a chore. I know the next stop on that train is the Mcdonalds drive-thru. It's another long string of excuses and rationalizations. But it's NOT ok. I can't let ambivalence or complacency have its place. That's why I blogged tonight and that's why I'm gonna read each and every blog on my list before I go to sleep.   

1 comment:

  1. Man, do I know that feeling. If this had been posted a few days or weeks ago, my advice would have been this: I know what you're going through. After my move I literally had about $1.50 in the bank and no idea when more would be coming. It was hard to feed myself, and I pretty much had to live off the junk my mom left in my apartment. It's okay to aim for maintenance while your life gets straightened out.

    Unfortunately, after this (http://my-crazybeautiful-life.blogspot.com/2011/09/day-fifteen.html) revelation, I can't actually give you that advice anymore. So here's what I've got for you now: If it's starting to feel like a chore, that means you're doing it right. Losing weight isn't supposed to be something fun, and it's not a privilege that you should give up on when times get hard. Because trust me, when you get back on track, you're going to be SO ANGRY at yourself. You will get back to the weight loss game, whether it's after two weeks of maintenance or three months of gaining. You'll look back and see where you could be vs. where you are, and you'll be SO angry. We're in this to better ourselves, and motivation is a fleeting mistress. We have to remember that we're not losing weight because we WANT to, we're doing it because we HAVE to. I mean, I don't particularly like paying rent, but I need a place to sleep...I don't particularly like working out and eating right all the time, but I need a body that is healthy and strong.

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