Sunday, October 6, 2013

Feeling a little blue today

I don't really know how to deal without something sweet to take the edge off. It will officially be a week tomorrow and it feels like I haven't had a carb in years. The cravings aren't as intense but they are certainly still there and now they are incredibly specific. Today it's cupcakes. That delicious frosting and then the spongey cake. The rational part of my brain knows how unimportant cupcakes are to my survival or my happiness but right now part of me just wants one so bad. I am holding in but this month is going to be a huge struggle. Life will never be the same and well two simple words: Thanksgiving and Christmas. I don't feel like defending myself about every choice to not eat the cookies and crap that will be everywhere. But if by then my body had changed maybe they will see that this time it's serious. I need to meditate. I think despite what I think, I really do better when I have something to do. Blah.

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